ending 2008

I've been doing some reflecting this morning on our year. It's been a trying year,but also one full of miracles. This time last year we were waiting the arrival of our little Daniel Paul. Once he came life changed,but for the good. Sometimes I long to go back to those first few weeks of Daniel's life. It was so special. Somethings I regret and others I don't. I guess that's all part of parenting,right?

Our first miracle was that we survived financially. The year 2007 was so hard for us financially. If we hadn't been children of God and received His blessings,we would have a lot of issues right now. I honestly felt like Job,ok sort of dramatic,but at times I did. Something always kept happening to us that seemed to set us back. To begin with, I really never desired to be a Mother as much as I did a wife. I heard so many horror stories about pregnancy and birth,that I had just decided that wasn't for me. So when I came up pregnant, boy did that catch me off guard. I was depressed the first month and in a daze. Sometimes I wasn't sure where the food would come from or the gas money or the money for the doctor visits. It was only God's provision that kept us a float. We stayed over with the bank though,every check almost. It was very hard on Mike,he felt like he had failed me. Wow, it was just tough. We clung to God and His Word though,along with encouragement from my wonderful group of ladies from Bloop and family. We realized that God would provide our every need according to his riches by Christ Jesus. It was hard,but we learned to trust God more and more. We finally made it to 2008,but still struggled a little to begin with. We had family to help us out and we are forever grateful.

Our second miracle was little Daniel Paul. We waited so long to see him,hold him,and kiss him. We knew he would be a very special baby. I had already had a dream about him and God gave me a verse for Daniel, I Timothy 4:12. It was so wonderful seeing him and holding him. I wasn't so scared anymore. I had asked God for peace and guidance. I survived his birth and those Mother instincts kicked right in. He has been a blessing to us. I am honored to have him as our son. He's got a lot of spunk,but I like it. It's been so neat watching him grow into the toddler (he's been taking steps for a week now) he is becoming to be. Motherhood is wonderful and challenging at the same time. I have to remember something our niece Brooke said once: God knows you can handle it or He wouldn't allow it. How many times do I forget that? Being a Mother is very challenging for me. To women it comes very natural I believe and for others you have to work at it some,I'm one of the latter. God sure is trying to rid me of my selfishness that's for sure. When I asked to be molded about 4 years ago,I didn't think it would entail some of the things I've experienced,but I've come through them by God's grace.

Another miracle is my Daddy. When my nephew,Landon,was several months old, his parents had him dedicated at their church. My Daddy showed up,which surprised us all. He'd not been to church since 1975,when my brother was born. My Mother has went all these years without him. He started coming regularly when my youngest niece,Marley, asked him what he was wearing to church one night. She went and picked out a shirt for him and told him it would be pretty for him to wear. He pretended to go to the woods to hunt,but showed up at church. That was the start of his journey. It was a shock to us all,but something we had been praying about. He had been building our Pastor's house and Bro. Don had invited him to come. He has been going every since. He said he got saved and he's really changed a lot. It's a miracle too. It's the talk of that small town,for sure. People cannot believe he's stopped cussing and is going to church. He's witnessing to the men he works with,his friends,and strangers. It's really awesome to see him that way! He's just a blue collar,hard working,country boy who can barely read,but do unbelievable math in his head. I respect him so much and really look up to him. If not for him I would not be who I am today. Mike even reminds me a lot of him too,they always say girls want someone like their Daddy.

God has done a lot for us this year. He's still testing us,which is fine,it just hurts sometimes. Okay,most of the time. I wonder sometimes why some seem to have it harder than others,but we've all got things that are hard,but they're all different. God just wants to mold us to the image of Christ. If we resist it,then it'll make it harder on us,but if we work with Him it isn't as bad. It definitely still hurts. One illustration I heard was how rocks smooth each other out. One that came to me a couple weeks ago was dealing with ironing. Clothes naturally have wrinkles in them while they are in the closet,some more than others. You use the hot iron to work them out. We're the clothes and God is the iron. He works those wrinkles out by experiences,trials,and struggles. Over all our year has been wonderful. We almost have a one year old in the house. It's really unreal sometimes. Where did the time go? Another thing I'm grateful for is the money/gift cards we received for Christmas. The great thing is we don't have to use them to make ends meet,we can actually buy other things. Thank You Lord.

Pretty much our year consisted of raising Daniel. Next year should be even funner! He's so fun,smart,and energetic. He'll be walking by his birthday I bet! It's crazy! I hope and pray your year has been great as well.