What's a man if he gains the whole world,but looses his soul?

Loose My Soul-Toby Mac,featuring Kirk Franklin and Mandisa

Man I Wanna Tell Ya'll Something, Man.
Man I'm Not Gonna Let These Material Thing's, Get In My Way, Ya'll.
I'm Trying To Get Somewhere.
I'm Trying To Get Somewhere, That's Real And Pure And True And Eternal.

Father God, I Am Clay In Your Hands,
Help Me To Stay That Way Through All Life's Demands,
'cause They Chip And They Nag And They Pull At Me,
And Every Little Thing I Make Up My Mind To Be,
Like I'm Gonna Be A Daddy Whose In The Mix,
And I'm Gonna Be A Husband Who Stays Legit,
And I Pray That I'm An Artist Who Rises Above,
The Road That Is Wide And Filled With Self Love,
Everything That I See Draws Me,
Though It's Only In You That I Can Truly See That Its A Feast For The Eyes- A Low Blow To Purpose.
And I'm A Little Kid At A Three Ring Circus.

I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World,
And Lose My Soul,Don't Wanna Walk Away,
Let Me Hear The People Say.
I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World,
And Lose My Soul,Don't Wanna Walk Away,
Let Me Hear The People Say.

(Mr. Franklin, Step Up To The Mic Sir)

The Paparazzi Flashes,
And That They Think That It's You,But They Don't Know That Who You Are Is Not What You Do,
True, We Get It Twisted When We Peak At The Charts,
Yo Before We Part From The Start,
Where's Your Heart?
You A Pimp, Hustler?
Tell Me What's Your Title,
America Has No More Stars, Now We Call Them Idols,
You Sit Idle, While We Teach Prosperity,
The First Thing To Prosper Should Be Inside Of Me.
We're Free...
Not Because Of 22's On The Range,But Christ Came In Range,
We Said Yes Now We Changed,
Not The Same, Even Though I Made A Fall,
Since I Got That Call, No More Saul, Now I'm Paul.
(yep!)

I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
Don't Wanna Walk Away, Let Me Hear The People Say.
I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
Don't Wanna Walk Away, Let Me Hear The People Say.
Don't Wanna Walk Away,Don't Wanna Walk Away


(Mandisa's solo)

How Do I Sense The Tide That's Rising?
De-sensitizing Me From Living In Light Of Eternity,
How Do I Sense The Tide That's Rising?
It's Hypnotizing Me From Living In Light Of Eternity,
How Do I Sense The Tide That's Rising?
De-sensitizing Me From Living In Light Of Eternity.

(Lord What We Gonna Do,we're Relying On You, All Eyes Are On You Lord, All Eyes Are On You, All Eyes Are On You Jesus.)

I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
Don't Wanna Walk Away, Let Me Hear The People Say.
(don't Let Me Lose My Soul, My Soul.)
I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
(this Is My Honesty, Father, Won't You Cover Me.)
I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
(don't Wanna Walk Away, And All Those People Say)
I Don't Want To Gain The Whole World, And Lose My Soul,
(don't Wanna Lose, I Don't Wanna Lose My Soul.)

Lord Forgive Us When We Get Consumed By The Things Of This World,
That Fight For Our Love, And Our Passion,
As Our Eyes Are Open Wide And On You.
Grant Us The Privilege Of Your World View,
And May Your Kingdom Be, What Wakes Us Up, And Lays Us Down.

I love Toby Mac's music,some is silly or crazy and some is really moving. Like this song. I love this song! I listen to it often in the truck if I am alone. It really moves me,like no song has in a long time. Sometimes I get frustrated or sad that we can't get ahead with money. Our nature is to want things and it never really stops. I have to remind myself that I won't die if we can't do things we want all the time or buy things we want. I believe God wants us to be prosperous and He'll bless us money wise, no doubt. But I don't believe He wants us to get everything we want. If so,then when do you learn discipline,self-control,and dying to your flesh? You really won't learn those things. If we are allowed to indulge ourselves with everything we want,we'd be spoilt brats,wouldn't we? I have to remind myself often that things I want and desire sometimes won't come to pass and to fulfill myself is not the command of my Lord. His command to to fulfill others desires and needs. Oh it's so hard sometimes. Having a child has shown me and taught me a lot. They help us die to our flesh if, we will allow them. I think that's one reason they are such a blessing. They're helping us be more like Jesus was as a servant,not a slave. A slave is made to serve someone,but a servant wishes to serve someone. At first, we may not want to stop what we are doing to serve our child if they need a diaper change,to be given a bottle,or put to bed. I mean, isn't what we're doing more important,anyways? I'm getting off the intended subject,sorry.

This song just really helps me to remember how we were raised. We didn't have a lot of money,not because my parents didn't try to make as much as possible,it was just how it was. One thing we always had was love and an ear to talk too. We never had braces,never had regular doctor visits,didn't go to a prestigious high school or college. We were just plain people. We didn't have new vehicles or a new house. We drove used vehicles and lived (always and parents still do) in a Mobile home,which we called our house. I remember one instance when the Pastor's daughter came to our home. Well, she turned around and called us and said, "There's just a trailer there, I didn't see your house." I really realized how this world can view things and how shallow people can be. I may never have a new home or a brand new vehicle,that's okay. If I do then I'll take it with no question,it's not that I don't want those things,but they can't be most important to me. I never want to put my husband in the position to work all the time or myself in the position where I have to work outside of our home,just for material things we don't really need. I see it happen way too often. It's amazing how God can use music to really teach you things about the scriptures. There's another song I love of his,but I'll share another time.

This is off topic,but I would love some suggestions for baby names. I really want to stick to Biblical names for a boy or girl. So suggest please!!! God Bless!

just life

We saw my parents last Wednesday. Daddy is still in severe pain. He's on Methotrexate,but it's not helped any yet. He'll go back to that dr. March 30th. It's hard to see them in pain and struggling financially. We try to help them when we can and my brother has been helping them. For the longest he would not let us pay my cell phone bill. It was like you're still my baby and I can pay it. Finally, I told Mama we want to pay it and she had no choice but to let us. It was that or cut their house phone off. They're cutting their cable out too. None of the 7 brothers or sisters have offered with any help. It shocks me since he has done numerous amounts of "free" work on their homes and such for them. He still can't go anywhere much. He made it to church finally one Sunday,but no one there has even called to check on him. Not even the Pastor. Which really blows me away,he's not the man he was when I went there. I've got him on our prayer request list and there's a lady that lives by us that has him on the one at her church. Please remember to pray for him. My Mother too. She's been dealing with a hiatal hernia for 20 years. She is supposed to see a specialist soon and hopefully he'll perform the surgery she needs. My Daddy is trying to get on disability,but it seems most of the time the ones who need it can't get on it. It's sad to think he may not ever work again,but then I think God can heal him. It's just blurry. I try not to think about it a lot or talk about it b/c it upsets me. So just keep them in your prayers.

I saw my CNM last Thursday. My iron,platelets,urine,blood samples,and pap smear all came back normal. I had lost 3 lbs,which made them ask questions. I've honestly not done anything,but not drink soda's and cut out sweets. I also chase Daniel around all day. She referred me to some chiropractors. We couldn't hear the heartbeat since I'm only 9 weeks,going on 10. I go back April 16th,my SIL's b-day, and hopefully we'll hear the heartbeat. I can't wait to know what it is!! I just can't imagine loving anyone as much as I do Daniel. That lil' boy tests me and tries me,but I love him so much. He's so special! He's doing so good. He tries to say ball,balloon,and Daniel. He loves to make gun sounds and tries to sound like a dog. He is sleeping on a mattress in our room and loves it. He knows it's his place. He's just been having a hard time going to sleep since Friday. Not sure why,but it's wearing us down. So pray he'll have a peaceful sleep time. He'll be 14 months on Thursday. Goodness. My new nephew will be here soon too! My brother and his wife are having their 3rd. Asher Drake is his name and he'll be called Asher. Her due date is April 30th,but she'll be induced before that. Daniel already loves babies,well on t.v. He hasn't seen one in person since all the cousins are older than him. When we saw my parents last week, we left Daniel there and went to eat at Hokie's. It's our favorite hometown joint. Oh I love it! It was nice to have a date. Daniel had fun with Papa and Mimi,he made them walk all over that 40 acres. Oh I hope and pray they don't have to do anything with that land b/c of their money situation. I just won't be able to handle that... Anyways. It was nice to go out with my hubby. I miss him! It's so fast paced here and his work keeps him busy. Hopefully, we're going to Daulphin Island next month for a day or so. Daniel should love the beach,he loves birds. We'll probably not go out during the day much,but the afternoon. I'm not wearing a bathing suit lol I've not worn one in a few years. I'm not big on exposing my body. I'd wear one with a tank and shorts if we went out. I'd rather not have my hubby have to practically hide his eyes the whole time. It's ridiculous how girls dress now days. That's a whole other subject. I'm just rambling.

I don't even get to read blogs anymore. I stay busy with Daniel,the house,and life. No wonder I've lost weight haha Daniel is a little fireball. Well, I hope all is well with you ladies. I miss you and maybe soon I can read more. Just be praying for us.

embracing my calling and loving my wee ones

Time really is flying. It's mid-March. Wow. My baby boy has grown up to a toddler. He's walking and running,jabbering and singing. I already miss him being so tiny. It's been such a blessing to watch him grow. Though I will admit there have been some very challenging and trying times. I would do it all over again. I love my child. He's so special to me. He's really getting to be so grown up or so he thinks. He's our little worshipper. When he hears music he will sing to it. It's so sweet! And boy he loves to dance to the music too. Oh and to know I've got another one on the way. Wow. That's amazing. I never pictured my life to be this way. Some days I want to pull my hair out,then some days it's so smooth. I just am so blessed. I struggle with thinking I'm not a good Mother or as good as others. I guess we all do. I don't know why I do. I sacrifice so much for Daniel and do what is best for him. Oh and to see Mike interact with his son. Wow. That's a blessing too. He loves him so much and Daniel is really taking to him. I just love it!

I've also really come to grips with my role and season of life now. So what if I can't make it to the Beth Moore conference? So what if I can't be in choir right now? Is it that bad? No. I am serving the Lord,by tending and taking care of my child. And that's just fine for now. Some Sunday's Mike will take him out into the foyer,others I will. I used to depend on church so much,the church building,not the body. I've been set free from that. I'm not saying I don't want to go,but if I miss a Sunday, why can't I do some worshipping here? It just feels good to embrace my role,instead of despise it or hurry it up. Things with the next baby will be different. I won't be afraid to nurse at church,I'll be using a sling. I won't be so afraid to try new things. Daniel actually sat still this Sunday and listened. My oldest SIL Robyn got saved and baptized. My youngest SIL got saved and will be getting baptized,along with my MIL who is saved and getting baptized.

I just wanted to do some writing. We're all fine. I go to my CNM Thursday and we'll hear the heartbeat! I'm thinking of all of you!

God bless!

Urgent Prayers for Marley

Yestserday at the school Marley(my brother's youngest girl) got hit by someone swinging they believe. Tammy (my Doula teaches at the church school) said she was laying limp and jerking when they looked. She ran over to her and thought she was dead b/c by the time she got to her she had stopped moving and her eyes had set,she wouldn't respond. She let out a gasp and her eyes closed. They thought she was dead. They called the ambulance and Anthoney(they didn't want to upset Amanda). Ant said when he got there she was still laying there,but awake. They took her to the local hospital and did tests that are returned saying she was fine. That was around 1 yesterday afternoon.

Last night he said she threw up twice,but slept fine. They said it looked as if her temple on her head was swollen. Today she threw up some and started complaining with her head about an hour ago. So they are at the hospital with her now.

They really aren't sure if she ran out in front of one of the swingers or if they were playing run through the swings. I guess for fear of getting in trouble the kids haven't really said what happened. I don't know,but I tell you one thing, I would find out Monday. Be praying. Ant is upset,Amanda is too,she just doesn't show emotions.

They just found out she has a concussion. She could vomit and have headaches for the next couple of weeks! Be praying for her!!

Thankful Thursday: Purposes

On this Thursday I'm thankful for Iris who has been hosting the meme Thankful Thursday. It feels good to be back. Lynn @ Spiritually Unequal Marriage is our host this month. Check out her post for Thankful Thursday.

I'm thankful for the purpose God has for my life. He birthed a desire for missions in my heart when I was a young woman and to be a submissive wife. I married at age 23 and began that journey. God has taken many places since then. Now, I'm a mother to a 13 month little boy and have one in the womb. It is amazing the purposes God has for my life. I would have never dreamed this life for myself. I always clung to Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the thoughts I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not evil, to give you an expected end. I have 2 encounters where I should have been dead,but that was not God's end for me.

Not only do I think about the purpose for my life,but for my husband too. He has brought Mike through a lot. He also clung to Jeremiah 29:11. The life he has now, he never saw it coming. He's so thankful for his family and his job. I also think of the purpose for Daniel's life even though he's so young. He's a special little boy. He's got a call that is evident on his life. I am praying that for my other child as well. I want my children to be as the men/women of old. To live with a holy,righteous fear of God that is wrapped in a love relationship with Jesus. They are our legacy.

So what is your purpose? Do you think you have not one? You're wrong. God has a purpose for everyone,it's just our choice to embrace it or not. Have a wonderful Thursday!

Are you in a valley?

It's been so long since I've written a post like I want too. I've been so busy and just not online much. I miss everyone's blogs,but for now you're in my thoughts.

I did want to post something. Mike and I were talking a couple of weeks ago and we were talking and trials. He said everyone is always sad about going through a valley,but in the valley is where there is fresh water . I really never thought of that. It's true though. You get water to go up the mountain. Just a thought to ponder on.

I've been acting so selfish. I feel like we are in a place Job was in, in many ways. I started reading Job last week. I have decided instead of complain about things I'll praise about them. It's so hard when you feel you are doing everything is right. We've been through so much in the past,I know this is just a small thing. It's just still hard. It's just everyday life,nothing in particular concerning children or marriage. I'm just going to praise Him through the storm!

I'm doing good. I don't feel sick now,just so tired and SO hungry! Mike leaves Saturday for 5 days. So keep him in your prayers,as well as us. Daniel is growing and learning. I go back to the CNM March 19th and I'll hear the heartbeat!!

Much love to all!