being seflish

Ok, I'm here to be honest and raw again. I am getting better at this, I believe.

I know everyone struggles with selfishness,it's our human nature too. I had no idea how much unselfish I would have to be with a baby. I'm not saying that in a bad way,but it's true. If any of you have babies, you know what I mean. I heard a man on a radio program a few weeks ago say this pertaining to God and children: God is chipping away at our selfishness, He is trying to rid us of our self-absorption. I didn't hear that until I had my baby boy though. That really hit me. I was like Wow. Okay. How selfish I have been!

Sometimes I just want me time,I want to be able to do the things I did prior to baby. By this I mean things around the house. Oh I used to keep my house clean and spotless. I used to be able to sit and read for hours. Or I could cook big meals. But now I can't do those as I would like to or to the extent I would like too. At first that really bothered me. I was just like, 'Why can't I have some Heather time??' or 'Why does my baby want so much of my attention,while I see others play happily on the floor.' I finally come to grips with the fact that he is just a baby. He can't do anything himself. That is why God gave him to me,to take care of him. I am not only to take care of him spiritually,but physically. This goes beyond feeding,changing diapers,and bathing. I am to play with my baby when he desires, I am to hold my baby when he desires,and I am to comfort my baby when he desires. Those things are fun and I love doing them,but it definately doesn't leave time for Heather. So what do I do? I whine about it! I get mad because I can't do what I want too do. Well, today I was reading my Bible and just happen to turn to Galations. Oh. The book that mentions not being selfish and fleshly. Yeah, it was God's turn to train me if you will. I turned to this passage.

16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.
19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
26 Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another.
Galations 5:22-26

Call that God or what? I thought, 'Oh. So that's for me, huh?' I heard God say, 'Yes, that's for you my dear.' I've been walking in the flesh. I've been fulfilling the lust of the flesh. Instead of being led by the Spirit,like I know to be, I let my flesh rise up and grow more than my Spirit. I also found these verses.

7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.
Galations 6:7-10

'That too Lord?'
'Yes, that too my child.'

I have The Charles F. Stanley Life Principles Bible, that my wonderful husband and son got me for Mother's Day this year. I wanted to share some of his thoughts on Galation 5:22-23.

-They never feel afraid to admit their faults, yet they always remember they have within them the power to rise above their fleshly appetites and desires. (referring to those who truly walk in the Spirit.)
-They aren't given to us as goals to pursue because you and I cannot produce fruit. The Holy Spirit is the producer; we are merely the bearers. The fruit of the Spirit was never intended to demonstrate our dedication and resolve. Rather, it reveals our dependancy on and sensitivity to the promptings of the Spirit.


I also looked up the verse that talks about Jesus coming to be served,not to serve. 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:28 I am a servant. Not just to God,but to my son. Daniel is not to serve me,he's a baby. Per say I'm to serve him. I'm to play with him,comfort him,and hold him when he desires. Instead of being more worried about everything being spotless or my reading,I need to be serving my son. He desires my attention. He gets so excited when I go to play with him. Father, help me not walk in the flesh so much and not to be selfish. I want my son to continue to love seeing me walk in a room or want me to hold him. Let me have the mind of Christ.


For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.
Mark 10:45